Reaction Negs

You must be a terrible dancer. [Why?] Because good dancers are usually graceful in heels, and you're kind of clumsy.

You should wear your hair up/down.

You're very little…

Those shoes look really comfortable/uncomfortable.

Geez, you must have driven your parents crazy.

Um, it’s too early in our relationship for you to be (doing whatever she was doing).

You’re already back to square one with me.

I bet you are high maintenance.

Alright, that’s it, I’m changing our Facebook status to “It’s complicated”.

Uh-oh… Tourette’s! (When she swears.)

(To obstacles) Does she have an off button?

Is she always like this?

How do you guys hang with this girl?

I can already tell, you and I are NOT going to get along.

I know you like I know a hole in the wall. Here's you. Here's a hole in the wall. Same thing.

If she keeps interrupting… Just call her on it. Say, "Why do you keep interrupting me, are you that insecure/immature that you can't give somebody a hance to speak?"

Or "Excuse me, may I finish my sentence?"

Or "Are you gonna let me finish?"

Or “ Hello? I'm talking, geez. Is she always like this?”

I'm not boyfriend material. You need a guy who will buy you flowers and be really nice to you. That guy over there looks perfect for you.

MYSTERY: (Loudly) Lady, I'm not going to make out with you!

Hello? It's private, geez.

You're such a dork!

Wow. You really wrecked a moment! Your past boyfriends must have really hated that about you.

[Target tries to see something you're showing obstacle] Excuse me! I'm showing her, not you. Wait your turn, geez…

[If you ask the obstacle a question and the target answers] I didn't ask you, silly.

You don't get out much, do you?

MYSTERY: Were you dropped on your head as a child? Don’t answer that, that was rhetorical.

OMG where's your off button? Jesus Christ, you can dress her up but you can’t take her anywhere, how do you roll with her?

Hands off, wait for your turn. Jesus, where's your off button?

STYLE: Oh my god, listen to you guys, this is just like watching The View.

OMG hands off the merchandise! What are we, starting a tab here, Jesus Christ, you must be rich...

I LOVE you guys... I love you guys so much... I'm ADOPTING you... [If target in set is bitchy, say "except you" and go for group hug that locks out the target from her circle]

You know what? I was just being polite, I really wasn't that interested…

No you can't try that on, your head's too big!

You had a hard childhood, didn't you?

Hey, don't make me come down there!

My, you come on strong! That isn't till later in the relationship.

That’s cute.

(Acting bitchy) What's wrong? Not used to talking to guys as devastatingly handsome as me? You wanna talk about it?

If the target is quiet I point it out by saying something like:(to obstacles) "You girls need to get her out more and break her out of her shell."