7 Questions for Rolland Sekretarev

Video interview

Interview hosted by Dr. Manhattan.

• Interview with Rolland Sekretarev 

Written interview

00:00

– Hi everyone! Today our speaker is Rolland Sekretarev. I'll ask 7 questions.

– Hi bro! Glad to see and hear you.

– We have a thirty-minute slot, let's jump right in! Do you have any intro you want to give? If not, let's start with the questions.

– Yes, it's such a theme that I immediately wanted to ask you how you felt the moments changed where you read Mystery Method, Tyler, RSD? Did you apply it in life and how did you see things change? How did you adapt everything to create your own method based on your individual traits and desires? Is that something you did?

– As you know, I never had problems with the game, I always had a "personal method". Then I added Mystery's model to my method. I never had gambits. You could say I was a 'natural born'.

– That's awesome, bro! So no problems — the trick is to develop your personality. All the limitations are in our heads: beliefs and doubts. Whatever we believe we find confirmation for. If someone lacks confidence and thinks everything is screwed, that's what will happen. If someone believes in monogamy — that the woman will be faithful — the illusion may break when reality turns out otherwise. You step out of the matrix and realize you misunderstood these things. Some people succeed and don't see how they're used by women.

– About cheating. Cheating is not just facts, it's in the head. You arrive to your girl and she doesn't open. Half an hour later she opens and sits with some guy. She says: "It was nothing, just a friend!" If you choose to believe her, then that's how it was for you. You will never know the whole truth. You judge events based on your past experience and assign probability. For instance, the chance that it was just a friend can be very small.

You are right: only what is in your head matters. The truth of whether it actually happened is irrelevant; it's your internal stance that counts.

– I agree.

– I think you'll tell us about what's in our heads. I wanted to hand over questions to Rolland, but he refused and said he'll answer on the fly.

– Fine, let's start with questions. I always answer spontaneously. Silence is my best friend — words come from silent spontaneity. Let's go.

4:10

– Tell us when and how you got into the game.

– Great question, I think many in the community will relate. As a child I stuttered a lot, I was afraid of everything and raised with bullshit beliefs, like many of us. I know you at four years old recited Mtsyri by heart, so you're a unique guy doing powerful things early.

I stuttered badly, was terrified, considered myself worthless. Every person is motivated by unmet needs. People achieve success because they want to. I started from a place of negativity. I think the best motivation is negative motivation — when your back is against the wall you have no choice and you work. When you have a choice you might not push as hard. It's important to find that hunger to keep pushing forward.

I was hungry for girls and for changing my beliefs; there was lots of tension. When I started talking to girls, I was terrified because of stuttering. I did what I saw in movies and cartoons: bought roses, drank a bottle of beer before dates because I was scared, shaking and stuttering. I wondered why nothing worked; why people rejected me.

Now it's funny, but then it was real. Then I learned about Leslie and started acting like an asshole. In Rogachev (33k people) it worked — I was boldly social, and the stuttering disappeared after months. I healed from stuttering, walked with girls, grabbed them, said nonsense, and it worked: I started getting sex. A month before turning eighteen I dated a girl. My friend asked: "Did you fuck her?" — "No." "How long dating?" — "A week." "You should fuck her!" So I invited her home and became a man.

It wasn't what I expected because of mental baggage; you can't fully relax in the moment. Now I can skip little preludes, relax and enjoy. Girls feel that.

– Was that the answer?

– No. I wouldn't stop at Leslie. Then I went to a club where girls said mean things about me, and I wondered why. Then I learned Mystery Method and it blew my mind!

Two weeks after reading the book I seduced my first 'status' girl, realizing status is often a mental construct you build. She was a singer who had been partying with the president at tables but she was still from Rogachev. I seduced her in a club, we had a date the next day, and I slept with her using Mystery Method under the maple tree.

I told her about the game and stages from four to ten hours, the state of comfort, and how you warm up for sex. She told me: "I already want you." I was thrilled that Mystery's techniques worked. Then I slept with her under a tree and she wanted to date. That was how I got into the game — you can act like an animal or seduce beautifully by stages.

10:29

– Which game do you prefer: day or night? Why?

– I prefer spontaneous game. It depends on your life stage. There was a time in my life… remember when we ran trainings in Tyumen? We partied hard, drank, met girls, went to clubs — it was great and spontaneous. You end up at a girl's place and it's casual sex. But you waste time; I spent endless nights drinking in clubs.

Then I realized my mission is training. It's the best thing for a student. You set big ambitions and harness strong energy. I enjoy that businessmen, top players, architects, and girls from America find value in what I say. It gives me satisfaction. Once you have a life mission you stop wasting time; it doesn't matter if it's day or night game.

You cast your net in various places: day game, online apps, night clubs. Where it bites, you use it. Gradually you stop wasting time on girls who play you. If it's light flirtation, okay, but most girls want you to waste time and put you on hold. The more famous you get, the more girls act up. What do you think about that?

– That's why I keep confidentiality in the game. I stay underground so nobody knows me.

– Right, that's smart. If a girl doesn't know you're in the scene, it's easier to have sex with her. For me it's more important to spread knowledge to students and friends.

There's a guy, Andrey Grach — maybe you don't fully believe he slept with a thousand girls. We talk and he sends videos; he's a sex addict who lives in the field. It's his life. He doesn't hide who he is. He openly tells a girl: "I'll fuck you!" and girls respond strongly. Over time you build a powerful reality and girls get drawn in.

Later there might be buyer's remorse: emotionally it was intense but he might not be the man she needs. She won't admit it. Women are full of contradictions. It's normal and you accept their nature.

15:56

– How to overcome approach anxiety? I can't force myself to approach.

– Mystery said to start playing and force yourself — it's like diving into cold water. With time the water feels warm. If you regularly go into the field, fear passes. You can go with a friend. When desire outweighs fear, you act. Until you force yourself, you won't start.

Sometimes you've had many partners or poly relationships, then you settle with one girl and feel like you don't need the field. After a breakup you'll be scared to go back because the pool feels cold. It's normal. Also you'll notice you used to do things on hype, and now you search for lower-effort ways to achieve the same. To remove fear, just start acting and don't treat it as a big deal.

Equalizing victory and defeat gives us freedom

Don't plan the number of approaches. If you plan twelve approaches, that image will be stuck in your head. Better be spontaneous: go anywhere — clubs, gatherings — and socialise. The best stuff happens spontaneously.

18:23

– Question about levels of consent across stages from A to S.

– I remember you talking about consent levels. When you interact with a girl, touch her and ask for something, it's always levels of consent. The more things you ask that she agrees to, the more comfortable she gets.

So the more steps she takes toward you, the more confident you can be that you'll have an amazing time together. But that doesn't guarantee a relationship. That's the next stage when you are in a relationship. You can try to 'retrain' a girl, but she may be unpredictable. Girls can act unpredictably and you can't control that. It's like Russian roulette.

If a girl makes a weird move, you move on and focus on your life. The more steps she takes (e.g., selfies, sending photos), the more valuable the investment. Many girls either play you, ghost you, or put you on hold.

There are girls who don't understand they harm their own pleasure. If a guy shows low value, she uses him as a resource. But do it right.

As Nietzsche said:

I desire a man's happiness. He desires a woman's happiness!

A smart girl does what her man asks and doesn't hurt his ego. She agrees; she won't argue, even if she wants to use him as a resource. If a guy is high-value, she might sleep with him but behave properly. Women sabotage themselves sometimes.

If a girl steps toward you, continue the conversation; if she doesn't, don't waste time. Love yourself. Be selfish in preserving yourself — don't sacrifice for others.

Men are attracted to someone who knows what he wants and won't concede to all her wishes. He can say "Goodbye!" and not care. Measuring consent saves time.

23:48

– What pushed you away from method toward 'natural game'? What did you take away?

– Mystery Method will always get you results. But each person has individual traits and wants to explore something else. I used the method and it worked wonderfully — in Tyumen I used the method and got amazing results.

I loved using Mystery's tactics, but I started drifting. Now I still use some elements, but I resonate more with being myself. RSD taught that you don't need to do things to seduce a girl; it's about your personality. Keep doing it. There's a phrase:

If you throw shit at a wall long enough, something will stick.

Analyze what you did. Keep applying strategies, but don't focus on any one girl. Keep a flow of options. Even if you're happy with someone, don't get complacent. Monogamy can make a man weak: you trade greatness for simple pleasure and stop doing many things like traveling or giving trainings.

I wanted to be with my girl and run trainings online, but monogamy made me weaker. I believe everyone creates their own life method. Mystery works 100% if you want positive results. But some things resonate more with you.

I recently texted Mystery and said I no longer believe in monogamy; he believes in sequential monogamy. He said his wife is special and they have children. He had a hard depression a few years back.

I don't believe in monogamy. I don't want to be "a deer". The rule now is: better not to check her phone. If you see something you'll want to beat her up! It's the consequences. I don't beat women, but emotions rise. You have illusions. She might be texting with others and you get destroyed. So drop expectations and accept that anyone can do something unpredictable.

Main point: live for yourself; women are a bonus. Everyone creates their own method. I filter out 99% of girls — why waste time on a chicken who wants you to chase her? I'm interested in girls who know what they want and take steps. I can seduce her by method, but why another hole? Sex and time with you is a great gift for a girl.

Be realistic; don't become fanatic. Be confident but considerate. If a girl takes steps towards you, invest; if not, don't waste time. Anything can flip at any moment. Even a loyal girl can switch. So be ready to move on.

– What do you think, bro?

31:18

– I think checking her phone will only make things worse. You answered the previous question, but I'll ask it: what do you think about polygamy, monogamy, long-term relationships including threesomes?

– I always dreamed of monogamy, to find that special girl. I was with a girl for two and a half years; I still sleep with her as well as others. I don't care about her even though she takes steps toward me.

Monogamy doesn't work — women have instincts and want high-ranking men. If you tell a girl "you are my girl, let's be monogamous", she might still act out. Over time she'll use you as a resource. She might say "you are not the same man I fell in love with." A top alpha can become 'deer' in a relationship.

I heard that in Chechnya girls are very faithful. An officer married a Chechen girl; they lived well and had a child, but after she started working she filed for divorce. Environment shapes people. The internet and friends influence them. You can't re-educate a girl.

I don't believe in monogamy anymore. Polyamory is cool — dating multiple girls makes you strong; being with one makes you weak because you invest and get used. Women are non-linear and can betray you emotionally. Enjoy the moment but be polyamorous.

Society won't all go polyamorous — it's not profitable for the system. You can live your reality and be yourself. If you put a ring on, you're a deer. Men start living for relationships, thinking it's their choice, but it's not. If a man shows low value, a woman will treat him poorly.

Mystery formula: "Interest generates interest; lack of interest generates lack of interest." Rewarding bad behavior and bending once makes it worse. Don't be manipulated.

There's no 'other half' — you are whole. Relationships won't make you happy. You are the source. Women are bonuses. Examples of successful monogamy don't disprove the general rule. If all truth were revealed about what women do, there'd be chaos. Women often forget and rationalize their actions. Monogamy is bad. Polyamory makes you stronger.

38:17

– When will Rolland get a Goddess and spawn Angels?

– Great question. I think I've answered: no Goddes and no kids for me. Why impose limits? For example, Grach has seventeen kids across Ukraine. I don't know how he manages.

We believe social programming. You can be a great player but decide to settle with one girl and marry. Then divorce. Jeff Bezos' ex-wife took billions — how did that happen? A husband can end up exploited.

A 'Goddess' is someone who vibes with you in the moment — eternal momentary bliss. But long-term reality often collapses. A long marriage works if you experience mini-divorces every day and remain detached. If a girl starts demanding, you move on. If she steps towards you, you keep her.

Don't compare yourself to others; compare only to yourself. Live for yourself and your ambitious goals. Women are bonus.

– What won't a girl do to feel shitty?

– Strong, bro! Exactly.