Drugs vs. Touch

This is a good routine for quiet spots in loud, crazy nightclubs. It lets you block out the wild environment and build a deeper connection, despite all the chaos and excitement going on around you.

Look at all these people drinking water here. A friend of mine once said that all these people drinking water are usually on drugs...

It's really interesting. The flip side of drugs is that they make you sensitive, you want touch, you enjoy and seek more physical contact than usual. When we were just born, we received a lot of touch, we needed it, it was necessary for healthy development and growth.

I read about a study that was done decades ago. They took 10 newborns and isolated them from each other in separate rooms. The babies had everything they needed to survive, they were fed their mothers' milk, received medical care, everything required for survival... But everyone was forbidden to talk to them, play with them, hug them, stroke their heads, be near them for long, etc. Human contact was minimized. The result was all 10 babies died, yes, they literally died in the first few years. It's a sad story, and you'd never be able to do such tests today.

But you know, isn’t it amazing? We need to be touched, it’s so important. But the older we get, the less touching there is in our lives, and our minds come up with all sorts of substitutes like success, influence, power. When we feel successful, it’s enjoyable because our mind and body link it to touch, to “social touch.” It’s as if society is patting you on the head. You get a sense of physical satisfaction. But that’s just a substitute. You can see incredibly successful people who have everything: cars, money, everything... And they’re still not satisfied. And it’s not just the rich who feel this, but many ordinary people too.

Most people feel like something is missing in their lives.

They don’t know what’s passing them by, so they buy more things, do more stuff, and eventually, as nothing works, they slide into depression. And most people have no one who would gently stroke them as their parents did when they were children.

Some hire hookers, buying fake love, but they know it’s not real. They suffer, realizing it’s a cheap substitute... A substitute that won’t work for long. I guarantee that these people value authentic, real hugs from someone who cares about them much more than anything you can buy for money.

Drugs like ecstasy multiply this craving hundreds of times, making it obvious. That’s why they go for drugs, to feel full of love, at least once in their lives, they see that part of themselves that keeps slipping away in everyday life. But when it wears off, they connect that feeling to the drugs and use them over and over. In reality, this deep thirst for love is always within us, it’s inside you and me, and it can never be completely satisfied.

Imagine what it would be like if I gently touched and stroked the back of your neck. Do you think that would feel good?

Lightly touch the back of her neck. Don’t do it sexually.

Feels good?

See? The substitute will never be better than the real thing...

Here, you can continue with some touch routine, or talk about the flow of energy, or read books on special techniques for touch and then demonstrate that you know her and her body better than she does herself.